Symphony of Death
by Lady Hitokiri
Summary: COMPLETE It's been 2 years, and Sora still hasn't returned to Destiny Islands. Riku decides to tell Kairi his true feelings, but will she still want to wait for Sora? Will Riku change or will he get the chance to turn everything completely around?
1. Feelings Revealed

**AN:** This story is a continuation of my one shot formerly called Watching Through My Window. I changed the title because it did not seem to fit with the rest of the story and it was not as exciting to me. Okay. I hope all of you like this. Thanks for taking the time to read and review!  
  
**Disclaimer:** I...do...not...own...Kingdom Hearts...and...never...will...only in my dreams!  
  
**Chapter 1: Feelings Revealed**  
  
Two years. It had been two years since we last saw Sora. Kairi and I had been together, but we had still been apart. I had never told her how I really felt about her. Was it...fear?...fear of rejection? In my mind I knew it was true.  
  
I was afraid she had already fallen in love with Sora. But she had never showed any signs of it. So why didn't I go for it? Those thoughts raced through my mind.  
  
I stood up from my position near the shore. I would tell her now. My steps led me across the sand, to where Kairi was standing, leaning against a coconut tree. I mustered up all I had inside. I'm really doing this...  
  
"Kai?"  
  
"What?"  
  
My heart skipped a beat. Even that little word made it do so. Her voice was so pure and beautiful. She had grown over the years, and not a second of her beauty was lost...it must have grown more.  
  
"Uh, we gotta talk."  
  
"Sure."  
  
"Well, I've been meaning to say something for a long time...a-and...a-and...I-I" Come on big boy, stop stuttering. I knew I was acting like a blubbering fool, so I decided to spill it all out right then and there.  
  
"I love you, Kairi."  
  
I waited for any kind of response. She stood there for a moment. The pause seemed like an eternity...pauses weren't a good sign. She seemed to be thinking. Her eyes narrowed, then met mine.  
  
"I'm sorry, Riku."  
  
I didn't understand what she was saying. My ears and mind heard what she said, but my heart didn't want to listen. "Huh?"  
  
Kairi sighed, looking away. "You're too late. I think I'm already in love with someone else..."  
  
"Someone else..." I said it quietly but I knew she heard me. I already knew whom she was talking about before she even said it.  
  
"...Sora." She continued. "But, even so. Now? You tell me now? After all this time?"  
  
I had to agree with her. I should've told her long before, but I didn't. Then I realized something. "Does he love you back? I'm pretty sure he's never told you he loves you."  
  
Kairi stood up straighter, taking her weight off of the tree. Her eyes left mine, slowly focusing on the entrance to the secret place. I took note of that.  
  
"He didn't actually say it in words...but he let me know in other ways..."  
  
I felt...jealousy? Of course. Sora was the one who sacrificed his heart for her. But what had I done? The same thing. I left my heart to darkness only in order to save her. But...the secret place...I would have to check it out for myself.  
  
I sighed. "Kai, it has been two years. He might not come back."  
  
I hated saying those words. No matter how much I wanted Kairi for myself I knew that Sora was still my friend and I still wanted him back home. We had been best buds. I remembered when we'd compete for Kairi's attention when we were little. We'd have wooden sword fights too and I would always win but we would never be spiteful towards one another. Even though he was the Keyblade Master and I wasn't. We were still friends...  
  
"No...he has to come back." I seemed to have hit her soft spot. Tears welled up in the back of her baby blue eyes. "He promised." She spoke louder now. "He promised!!!!"  
  
I grabbed hold of her shoulders gently. "Kairi, I want him back too but you might have to accept fate."  
  
Kairi nodded, and I let go. Her eyes met mine again. "I...I need to see."  
  
"What?"  
  
"I need to think about what you told me. Sora might not come back, so there may be no use waiting, maybe..."  
  
I breathed outward heavily. "So, you're saying you'll only love me back if you find out either Sora doesn't love you or if he doesn't come back?" I knew that those words were the harsh way of putting it. But in a way it was true.  
  
"Sort of. Just...give me some time...okay?"  
  
I nodded, knowing that I still had a chance. Knowing that Kairi could still become mine. I needed her to love me back so much...  
  
She turned, silently walking towards the secret place without a goodbye. I'd have to wait until I knew what she was talking about in there. I turned, briskly walking towards my house. It was a short walk. Short and lonely.  
  
I ignored everything for the next few days, both patiently and impatiently awaiting Kairi's response. Would she ever love me back? It had been a while. She would have to decide soon because I didn't know if I could wait very long.  
  
I was at my window, just staring at the beach below. I could see a lot of the island from my view. I had been like that the last few days, looking at the scenes outside. I guess you could say I was a hermit.  
  
It was early evening. The sun was setting, the pink and purple and orange colors somehow reminding me of Kairi. My eyes scanned the calm ocean that surrounded Destiny Islands. Then I looked lower, towards the shore, the waves gently nipping at it.  
  
And then...I saw something that made my eyes grow wide. My heart beat a million times faster, it seemed. I stood up, leaning as best I could to get a better look at the figure below that I was staring at.  
  
Sora...Ragged, worn out, Keyblade at his side. Where he came from, I did not know. What he had gone through, I did not know. But I knew that he was back.  
  
A smile actually broke out from my lips. I hadn't done so in a long time. I turned to go down and outside to greet him when something caught my eye.  
  
Kairi saw him first. She came from the secret place area. I had bet that was where she was. For while I hid away in my room, she would hide away in that dirty old cave that we'd play in when we were smaller.  
  
Kairi walked slowly at first, half not believing Sora was there. But there was no mistake about it. Then she began to run towards him.  
  
He dropped his weapon on the ground, running to meet her halfway. They embraced...and I didn't feel jealous. A hug was a hug. But still....  
  
Still holding her, I saw Sora reach into his pocket, pulling out a small item. It was white, and glinted from the setting sun...I remembered it from long ago...her good luck charm...  
  
She took it from him, holding it close to her chest. I could tell that they were talking. But what were they saying?  
  
Then, Sora reached out and caressed her cheek. My nerves broke a bit. My smile dropped. I knew something was going to happen...but...  
  
But it happened. He leaned forward...and...so did she. They kissed for a long time. I averted my gaze momentarily.  
  
Him. She had chosen him. I knew it would take a while for me to get over it. To get over my feelings about her. Maybe I never would...I felt angry, but knew that it wasn't her fault. It was my fault.  
  
So it was then, watching through my window, that I knew she was already taken. That I knew that she would never be mine, and she never was. 


	2. Things That Change

**AN:** Alright everyone! Here is chapter 2 of this story! I hope those of you who liked the one-shot will enjoy this. I'm going to take it to a slightly different level later on but I still think that it is good. I will gladly accept any reviews, though if you want to say anything negative please try to turn it into something constructive that will help me become a better writer. Thanks for R&R-ing! Enjoy!  
  
**Disclaimer:** I don't own Kingdom Hearts no matter how much I wish I did.  
  
**Chapter 2: Things That Change**  
  
It was the worst day of my life. Sora had come back, but that meant that Kairi would pick him. And she already did. And that broke my heart.  
  
Sora had already been home for a few hours, yet I hadn't even talked to him. I wasn't even sure if I wanted to, at least until I calmed down a bit. Unfortunately, from my window I spotted Kairi and Sora walking towards my home. Sora as in fresh clean clothes, and he looked to have taken a shower. But his battle wounds were still evident Mainly a large slash running up his left arm.  
  
I closed the shades to my window and hoped they wouldn't enter. When I heard them come in I knew things needed to wait. So instead I opened the window, and carefully climbed onto the ledge. Then, hoisting myself onto the roof, I silently slipped away from my friends for a while.  
  
That's what they were- my friends. But I knew I'd just end up being a third wheel while they'd make out right in front of me. At least that is what I guessed.  
  
I sustained my footing and went to the very top of the house. Then I sat down at its peak. I could see much of the island, but as for myself I was pretty much concealed. I stayed like that the rest of the day, sitting in my own pity, my tears, my sadness, reflecting on the past and how things could've turned out.  
  
I eventually fell asleep, when the sun was still starting to set. Only an hour or so later I woke up, but it was not on my own. I opened my eyes and turned. Sora was on my right, sitting next to me, a hand on my shoulder. I looked at him for a second, then my eyes shifted to the darkening sky.  
  
"Hey, Riku. Kairi and I've been looking for you all day. I've finally come home." His voice. He was older now, and I was too. It had been two years since we'd last seen each other. But he seemed to have grown up- like he didn't need me to watch over him like a big brother anymore.  
  
I still kept my eyes transfixed on the emerging stars. "Uh, yeah. I'm glad you're back, but...but I just needed some time, you know?"  
  
I saw from the corner of my eye that Sora nodded his head. I think he understood. "Is this about Kairi?"  
  
I rested my chin on my hands, sighing. "Uh, yeah." I looked at him. "It's just that-"  
  
"I know." Sora cut me off. "We always competed for her attention when we were younger. I know what you are talking about."  
  
I nodded. He did understand...in a way. But he would never understand one thing- how it felt to be rejected by the one he loved, by the one I loved. Suddenly I was filled with the jealousy that I promised myself I would not have.  
  
HE got Kairi. HE got the Keyblade. HE saved the worlds from destruction and the Heartless. HE got the battle wounds so he could show everyone what a hero he was. All the while I felt so lost, so useless, so unloved. I stood up. "I gotta go."  
  
Sora copied my move, grabbing my arm. "Listen, Riku, if you wanna talk about it- or about anything-"  
  
"No." I faced him, and I knew he saw something different in my eyes. Things had changed. I wasn't the same boy I was two years ago. He hadn't been there. And now things were different. And I didn't like it. I pulled my arm away. "Just leave me alone."  
  
I sat back down. I could tell he wanted to say something, but then he decided against it. in a silent exit he made his way back to the edge of the roof and climbed back through my window. Yes, he was trying to help, but I didn't care- not anymore.  
  
I saw him as he left my home. He was headed for Kairi's. I scowled. Yes- a lot of things fad indeed changed. And soon, I knew, Sora was going to get the full effect of that change. And it wasn't going to be good.  
  
When all had gone to sleep I climbed back into my house. I was glad to be out on my own, not be burdened with living with my parents like Sora and Kairi. I eventually decided to go to sleep. Fatigue had overcome me. My thoughts and plans were all that kept me awake, but finally I succumbed to slumber.  
  
------------------  
  
It was a grand new day, the first morning Sora would have on Destiny Islands since a long time. It could possible be his last...  
  
I could swear that when I looked in my mirror this morning my eyes were different. There was more emptiness in them, it seemed.  
  
Nevertheless, I made my way outside, planning to take a visit to the secret cave. I hadn't been there in a long time. I hand made my way to the little pool with the waterfall when someone called my name. I turned around.  
  
Kairi walked up to me. "What do you want." I spoke harshly, but I didn't care.  
  
"Hey, Riku! Sora's back! Do you wanna help set up for the party we're gonna have later on?"  
  
"No...thanks." I added that in just to be a little nice.  
  
"Are you okay? You seem a little different- kinda changed."  
  
I glared at her. Yeah, right. Like she didn't know what was wrong. "Just leave me alone okay."  
  
She seemed to be a little hurt, but the message got across. She ran away without another word. I didn't care. My thoughts were set on the secret cave. I was going to find out once and for all what was in that little place. And, for some reason, I had a feeling that I wasn't going to like it. 


	3. The Transformation

**AN:** Wow...I'm getting this up pretty quickly. Thanks to all my reviewers and sorry I didn't tell you before that I had the one-shot! Well, I kinda turned this fic into a different direction than was normally planned but I think it is still good. Thanks Lvkishugs, Lyphe, and Doomboy2000! Sorry this chapter is kinda short. I'll try to make them longer as I go!  
  
**Disclaimer:** I don't own Kingdom Hearts and don't know anyone who does. : (  
  
**Chapter 3: The Transformation**  
  
I made my way through the secret place, squeezing past the tight spots. I looked around when I got to the main room, but saw nothing that was of significance. There were only drawings that I vaguely remembered making when I was younger.  
  
I was determined to find out what Kairi was talking about, so I searched everywhere in the area. Then I came across a picture on the wall that I knew was much different the last time I had seen it.  
  
Kairi and Sora were sharing a paopu fruit together. Fury swelled up in me. They were so selfish. I guess I was the only one who remembered when we were smaller we said that we'd all share one together, as a symbol of our friendship forever. I guessed that all changed.  
  
Then I noticed something that made me even angrier than before. It was on the ground...a leaf from the paopu fruit...they just couldn't have already done it. But I knew somehow that they did.  
  
My heart beat faster, my jealously multiplying hundreds of times over. I didn't know what had come over me. One day I was telling myself it wouldn't be the end of the world if Kairi didn't pick me, then the next day my whole world was falling apart because she didn't.  
  
I picked up the small leaf, crushing it in the palm of my hand. I had some business to take care of. I got up, quickly making my way out of the cave. I continued on through the sand, across most of the island.  
  
Sora and Kairi were there, setting up things for the party. I couldn't stop myself. My emotions suddenly flooded my mind, and I was drowning.  
  
I walked right up to Sora's back, turning him around. I grabbed him by the collar, bringing him close to my face. "You think you can just come back and everything will be fine?" I hissed. "You think everything's okay and you're everybody's hero? And you get Kairi and everything and I get nothing?" Before he could respond I moved my arm quickly, getting ready to punch him.  
  
But he brought his arm up swiftly, grabbing mine. I tried to get out of his grasp, but it was too strong. I let go of his collar and prepared to hit him with my other hand. He grabbed that one too, forcing me back.  
  
"Let me go!" I said, not very loudly. I got even angrier when I could tell he was stronger than I. But it didn't used to be that way. All of that time fighting the Heartless made him better than me, and I didn't like it.  
  
Sora shook his head. "Riku, what has gotten into you?" His grips were still firm. "Why can't we just talk and work things out?"  
  
"Things will never work out." Then I relaxed, losing some of my tension. Sora let go of me and stepped back a bit. All the while Kairi was in the background, aware of everything. But I didn't care. I looked Sora straight in the eyes. "Things will never work out for me."  
  
"Riku, do you think my life has been any better? I've been away for two years while you've been here all this time. I'm finally back but you've been so strange lately I don't know what to think." Sora looked down.  
  
I smirked. "Hmph. I'd rather spend two years away than stay here for two years and not get Kairi."  
  
Kairi walked up behind Sora. "I know this is about me. Please, let's just work this out. Friends aren't supposed to fight- not like this."  
  
"Friends?" I laughed. "Yeah, right. I don't think it'll last for long."  
  
Sora was still looking down. "I- I think I know what's wrong, Riku. You aren't being yourself because that is just it."  
  
I stepped forward defensively. "What do you mean by that? Are you saying I'm still possessed? Is that it, huh?"  
  
He looked up now. "I don't know, Riku. All I know is that the real Riku wouldn't act like this."  
  
"Well, think again." I slowly reached my hand into my pocket, trying to grasp the knife handle.  
  
Sora must have sensed it, or seen it, and in an instant sparkles and glimmers appeared near his hand, then the Keyblade took its form. "Don't make me use this. I don't want to have to."  
  
I slipped my hand out of my pocket, empty, placing both hands on my head instead. I knelt on the ground. Something was wrong. I was feeling so lost inside. And I couldn't find my way out. I closed my eyes. "Why can't I just turn back time! I never would've accepted darkness in the first place. I don't know why I was so stupid!!!"  
  
I let out a cry of anguish, then looked up. Sora gasped, then Kairi too. I didn't understand what was wrong. "What?"  
  
"Riku, your eyes...they're...they're completely pitch black." Kairi shifted a little bit, standing more behind Sora. That's right, I thought. Hide behind your hero.  
  
I looked down, at my arms and hands. The veins were black, beginning to stand out distinctly against my pale skin. I looked up. Sora was in his defense stance. I looked at myself again. My nails were now black, and my hair was too. I didn't understand what was going on. I felt the same, but I was now beginning to look different.  
  
"Sora...what is happening?" Kairi asked.  
  
He shook his head. "The portal..."  
  
"What?"  
  
Sora sighed. "I'll explain later. Right now we need to get to the portal. It'll be near the dock. That was where I arrived."  
  
Kairi seemed confused, but nodded. I was a little bit too. Count that a lot. And for the first time in a while I was actually scared. What was happening to me? Was my anger taking over? To me it just seemed like a dream- a really bad dream where I couldn't wake up. But I knew that it was for real.  
  
I stopped thinking and looked up. Sora and Kairi weren't there. Then I remembered the portal. Sure enough, when I turned I saw the two running towards a bright door-shaped thing- the portal.  
  
Hoping to catch up to them, I ran as fast as I think I ever did before. I saw Sora grasp the handle and open the door, then step inside. He began to pull Kairi in, too.  
  
"NNOOO!!!!" I yelled. For some reason I didn't want them to go. I don't know why. I reached for the gold colored door handle, smiling when my hand grasped it. But it burned so much that I screamed out in pain and let go. Then the door closed, and disappeared. And I was left alone.


	4. Unknown Path

**AN:** Hello everyone! Yeah...I know, poor Riku. But that is the way this story is going and uh...let's just say it won't get better...for now at least. I want to thank all of my reviewers so far: Lvkishugs, Zanisha, Doomboy2000, Tako Hana, Lyphe, aliasfan...yeah. You guys make me so happy!!! Well, I hope this chappie is good...um...song is New Beginning by Trapt, in italics. I felt like putting a song in, so, enjoy!  
  
**Disclaimer:** I'm getting tired of writing this. I don't own Kingdom Hearts!  
  
**Chapter 4: Unknown Path**  
  
I dropped the rock, looking down at the cuts on my hands. It had taken a while, but I had successfully managed to cover up Sora and Kairi's drawing by scraping the rock against it on the wall. All that was left was a huge white splotch.  
  
"My best work of art." When I looked down at my hands it was a pitiful sight. My nails were black, along with my veins as well. Plus I had cuts from the rock, and not to mention the burns from the portal's door handle. I ripped off a piece of my white shirt, binding them on the hand with the burns.  
  
I still was so confused, and angry. Something was very different. Sora had been able to touch the handle, but not me. And I wondered why. More importantly I wondered where they were and if they were ever going to come back.  
  
But then I realized I didn't care. Sure, I wanted revenge. But I felt that them being gone was better than having them here, right in front of me, a constant reminder of my failure.  
  
I was about to leave when I suddenly heard something. I wasn't sure what it was. It was faint at first, but then grew louder. It was then that I realized what it was. Creaking...  
  
I turned around. The door. The one that had always been closed. But not anymore. It was slowly opening, seemingly on its own. It stopped midway, not enough for me to see what was inside. I walked closer, pulling on the door to widen the opening.  
  
All I saw was...a path. Only one straight road that as far as I could see led nowhere. On either side of the path was darkness. It did not look inviting, yet I seemed drawn to it. Curious, I stepped inside, taking a few steps forward.  
  
The door closed behind me, slowly again. I looked back and saw that there was a handle. Carefully, I tried opening it again. And despite the way things always turn out, I was able to open it. Knowing that I could go back made it easier to keep walking.  
  
I was eager to find out what was on the other end of the road. As I walked, I noticed that the darkness on either side of me seemed...alive. Like it was moving, but in a way it wasn't. Like something was there, yet there wasn't. Or so I thought.  
  
After a while of walking down the road I thought about going back. The path seemed endless. Plus I didn't know where it ended up. Just as I was about to turn back something came out of the dark shadows in front of me.  
  
A...Shadow? It was a Heartless. But...I thought they were gone for good. Then it hit me. Sora still had the Keyblade...and that meant that there were still Heartless. So why had he come back to Destiny Islands if there were still Heartless to defeat? I thought. Then another thought occurred to me. He knew that a portal would come. But what significance did it have?  
  
"Taken again by the darkness?"  
  
I looked up from my deep thoughts. I had almost forgotten about the Shadow. But now there was something else in front of me. Or rather...someone. He seemed to also have come from the darkness on either side of me.  
  
"Ansem," I said hatefully, my voice cold. "I'm not taken over by anything."   
  
He looked the same, yet was dressed in different clothes. He wore a black vampire-like cloak, with black pants with a red stripe running down each front. He also had on a red shirt that was ripped in almost every spot. And he was still alive....somehow...  
  
"Are you sure?"  
  
I took a step back. "No one controls me but myself."  
  
Ansem smiled evilly. "Are you sure that you can trust even yourself with doing your own actions?"  
  
I narrowed my eyes at him. I wasn't falling for any of his tricks. I knew he was just trying to play with my head. "Get away from me."  
  
Ansem continued talking, ignoring my sharp command. "Don't you think something is up? I mean, you must be controlled by something. You look different- darker features. For someone with a darker heart."  
  
"Shut up."  
  
"Do you think an ordinary person would be able to open one of the doors to darkness? Do you think someone not possessed would be able to attract a Heartless and have it not attack him?" He pointed to the almost motionless Shadow in front of me. "It's just waiting for you to command him to kill something- or do anything you ask."  
  
"Shut up!"  
  
"Oh, or how about this? Do you think someone who was filled with darkness could open one of the doors to the light?...mainly...that light portal?"  
  
"SHUT UP!!!!!" I yelled. I couldn't take this anymore. I knew I wasn't being controlled. I could do whatever I wanted.  
  
Ansem made a small laugh. "Ooh...you're getting angry. I like that. Go on, let it out."  
  
"Stop playing with me, Ansem. You'll never be able to control me. I'm my own master."  
  
"Really? It seems like you're your own prisoner. Yes, you're trapped in your own world of hatred and jealousy, sadness and loneliness, emptiness and grief. I know what those two fools Kairi and Sora did to you. Now they must pay. Join me and you will be set free from your prison and both of us will get the revenge we need."  
  
I looked down. Was he right? No. He was wrong. Wait- it seemed partially true. No- I can't trust him, I thought. But...I looked up.  
  
Ansem's hand was outstretched. "Take my hand and we will be partners. You can still be your own master. And, better yet, you can be the master of the Heartless. And they will obey all of your commands..."  
  
Ansem stepped forward, his hand still extended. "Come with me, Riku. We will be partners. Both of us cannot do this alone. But together, we will be unstoppable." I looked up at him. Should I take his hand?  
  
_The pressure is building_

_ I want to break away_

_ Motivation is lacking_

_ The point starts to fade_  
  
I was still unsure. What he had done to me before- I would never forget. But...I felt that in a sense I needed him to help me, to fill my void. But what was the right path? To accept or to not?  
  
_I look to the bottom _

_Still empty still the same _

_I'm waiting for something _

_To show me the way _

_To the path that I should take _

_It's just to real to go ahead and fake  
_  
But I thought, maybe I could use him like he used me. Once I got what I needed I would have nothing to do with him. My choice was getting clearer- but I didn't want to be a fool again.  
  
_Every step that I make _

_Name your price _

_'Cause I don't feel so right _

_I would give anything _

_I want to start over again _

_Name your price _

_'Cause I don't feel so right _

_Am I the only one?  
_  
"So, will you be my partner? There is not much time to choose. For as we speak Sora is getting farther and farther away. We must catch him. Plus I have a plan that will not fail if you and I both are a part of it. Do you want to succeed?" Ansem pressed on.  
  
_What do I want _

_I have nothing to say _

_Whatever it is I want it today _

_Do we choose our own ground _

_Do we choose to stay?_  
  
I stepped forward. "Ansem. I loathe you with a passion. But I will not pass up your offer."  
  
_Well I've seen too many throw it away   
_  
Ansem smiled. "Now that you have opened a new door, step through it. When you have the opportunity, take it. I am pleased with your decision."  
  
I looked down. He might think he's playing me, but in the end we'll see which one loses the game. I looked up at him. "This is our chance."  
  
Do I see one small chance To be myself to try to make it last  
  
"Follow me. For this road leads nowhere. You must enter this darkness to get to where you need to be." Ansem stepped into the dark shadows. I smiled evilly. I was going to make sure my needs were met before I rid of him. I turned, walking behind Ansem into the black void.  
  
_Every step that I take_


	5. Turnaround for the Past

**AN:** I went to the dentist today. I thought I surely had a cavity or two but then I didn't. Yay! Sorry it's taken me a while to get this up. Yesterday I was going to post a chappie but then my whole storyline was turned around. Yeah...my old one was not very good but then Lvkishugs gave me a great idea...But don't worry. I'll still try to post quickly if I can. This chappie is kinda short, so sorry. Enjoy!  
  
**Disclaimer:** Hold on, lemme check...flips through book...Nope. Still don't own Kingdom Hearts...  
  
**Chapter Five: Turnaround for the Past  
**  
I could feel the stillness in the air, an eerie cold that raised the hairs on my arms. But I dared not show Ansem that this clamoring darkness surrounding me made me uneasy- too uneasy for comfort. Despite this black that seemed "alive", the windy darkness held no substance, like I was only walking through air. But anyone could tell that it wasn't.  
  
And although everything was darkness I could still see where I was going. Each step I took caused a ripple in the dark ground below, yet the surface seemed stable. It reminded me of the type like in End of the World.  
  
I continued to move forward until Ansem moved beside near and stopped me. He said nothing, so I decided to speak up.  
  
"So, what exactly is your "great plan"," I asked, crossing my arms.  
  
Ansem smiled, pulling out a round glassy object from his cloak. It was an orb of some sort, black with swirling colors of blue, red, purple, and yellow inside of it.  
  
"What's that?" I asked, only half-interested. How could this ball be part of Ansem's plan?  
  
"Look into it, Riku," he said quietly, ignoring my question. He brought the sphere closer to me. "Tell me what you see..."  
  
I peered through the glass. At first the only thing I saw were the mesmerizing colors, but then they swirled faster until there was an image. My eyes widened. The picture was of myself and Kairi...and I was holding her, smiling. Also, my hair and eyes were back to their original colors. I looked back up at Ansem.  
  
"What do you see?" he inquired.  
  
"I...It's Kairi and me..." I responded, still not sure where Ansem was going with all this.  
  
Ansem chuckled. "And that's what you want, isn't it? To have Kairi for yourself?"  
  
"Of course." Yes, I had always loved Kairi. I felt like I could give anything for her. But that image didn't matter. Because in real life she didn't love me back. "What about it?"  
  
"I can make that image come true...you can have your wish. I believe you want revenge, but what if you could have had Kairi in the first place? Then there'd be no need for revenge, because you wouldn't feel jealousy towards Sora since Kairi wouldn't be his."  
  
I wasn't sure if I heard Ansem right. Did he just say Kairi could love me and not Sora? Was this for real? I stared back at him in disbelief. I wasn't sure if Ansem would really be able to do that. My heart was beginning to beat faster.  
  
Ansem brushed back some of his long silvery hair. "Yes...it's true. I can change what has already happened to you. Or rather, you can change it. _You_ can experience what Sora has gone through. _You_ can be the Keyblade Master," he said excitingly. "_You_ can be with Kairi...and Sora can't."  
  
I furrowed my brows. I still didn't completely understand him. There was still one question on my mind. "But..._how_?"  
  
Ansem lifted up the orb, which was now transparent. "This...this can bring you into the past and whatever you wanted, it would be yours..."  
  
My mouth dropped. This was it! I could get everything that Sora took from me. My mind continued to race. I wasn't sure what good this would do for Ansem. I guessed he had his own thing planned, or maybe he could change things too. I decided to question him. "What good would you get out of it?"  
  
Ansem was still smiling, which I have to admit creeped me out. "Oh, don't worry about me..." he said nonchalantly. "I won't get in your way. I just ask that you forget about me and leave me alone. I only want to live normally. By going into the past I can get what I want...but you can get what you want too..."  
  
He seemed to be slowly changing the subject. Yet I didn't care. I was willing to risk whatever Ansem was planning- if he even _was_ planning anything- just as long as I got what I wanted.  
  
"Kairi will finally be mine. I never thought it would happen, but it was going to. I stared at the glassy ball. "Bring me into the past now! I can't wait any longer!"  
  
"Neither can I," Ansem muttered. "Riku, grasp the orb, close your eyes, and think hard about what you want. Then you'll feel a strange pulling sensation. And when you open your eyes again, your wish will be fulfilled and you will be where you need to be..."  
  
I nodded to Ansem, then did as I was told, grabbing the sphere. I imagined myself with Kairi, but better yet, I thought that Sora and I should switch places. That way he would know how I had felt. He would be experiencing the same pain of rejection that I did, while I would be the one returning to Destiny Islands and Kairi would choose me over him.  
  
Then he would feel that sadness and I wouldn't. My eyes closed tightly, and I continuously dwelled on these thoughts. I couldn't wait. After all, I had risked my life for Kairi, and now I'd be getting what I truly deserved- her love.  
  
Suddenly, my stomach dropped, and I felt like every inch of my body was being pulled into different directions. My head was spinning, and it was getting hard to think. But practically as soon as the feeling began it ended. I slowly opened my eyes. I was standing in a strange light, and right in front of me was a gold door.  
  
"The portal Sora had used to get home..." I whispered to myself. I looked down, noticing for the first time that something was in my hand. It was the Keyblade!  
  
I could barely breath as I examined the spectacular weapon. I finally had what was really rightfully mine in the first place. But after all that I had been through, I really didn't care too much about it.  
  
Yes, its power pulsated through my veins, and it gave me control, but really I only cared about Kairi. She was what I was living for. The Keyblade most likely wasn't going to be there forever, as I guessed, but my connection with my sweet redhead would.  
  
Nevertheless, I held the weapon tightly, stepping forward. I used my left hand to grab onto the gleaming portal handle.  
  
This was it. I grinned widely, pushing the door open. I closed my eyes, stepping through.  
  
"I'm coming, Kai..."


	6. Going My Way

**AN:** Woo...this is getting good...heh heh. Thanks so much for all the reviews. You guys are the best!!!! Well, I hope this chappie is good enough too. For those of you who are reading my poems, I'm trying to make some new ones but yes, alas, writer's block. I'll try to put one up eventually though if I can. For now, sit back and relax and read...  
  
**Disclaimer:** Don't own Kingdom Hearts...or Riku, Kairi, or Sora...too bad.  
  
**Chapter Six: Going My Way**  
  
As I stepped through the door, all I could see was a bright shining light. But then I could see the outline of a few palm trees. I started to hear the faint sound of the waves. Then I could see some clouds, and I started to feel the sand beneath my feet. This went on until all of Destiny Islands was in my view.  
  
I could hear the seagulls screeching, and the soothing sound of the small waterfall. It was kind of hard to believe, but it seemed like I was hearing these sounds for the first time in years. It felt strange to breathe the salty sea air and stand on the beach.  
  
Then a thought popped into my mind. It actually had been years since I'd done those things...since I'd seen Destiny Islands. Two years to be exact, because Sora and I had ultimately switched places.  
  
All of the things I was feeling right now were exactly what Sora had been feeling. But I could still think for myself. And I still remembered all that had happened with Ansem. My lungs filled with air, and I exhaled loudly.  
  
My aquamarine eyes scanned the island, which I never remembered was so beautiful. I started to walk along the shore, the waves moving close but not enough to get my feet wet. The sky was a magnificent color. Actually, it was the blend of pink, orange, purple, and some blue.  
  
Yep...the sunset still reminded me of Kairi. At first I never knew why. But now I actually thought I knew the answer. A sunset is beautiful, like her. But then night slowly overcomes it. I felt that Sora represented the dark of the night, and that trapped within him were the stars...which still represented Kairi. He took her away from me. I could see the stars, but they were not within my grasp. Unattainable, just like Kairi.  
  
Until now. I knew soon that Kairi would be leaving the secret cave and see me, while Sora would watch everything through his window, just like I did.  
  
I turned my attention to where the secret place was, waiting for Kairi to emerge. And then finally, after what seemed like such a long time, her lovely figure exited the cave. At first she didn't see me. She rubbed her eyes. I assumed she must have been crying...crying for me...  
  
I still held on to the Keyblade, but let it hang loosely. I took a few steps forward, waiting for her to look up. And then she did. Even though we were a fair distance away, our eyes met and locked. She seemed at first to be in disbelief. She rubbed her eyes again. Yep...I was still here.  
  
Then she smiled, and began running towards me. I did the same, dropping my Keyblade so I'd be able to hug her. We met in the middle, and embraced.  
  
I looked down at her lovely face, a smile on mine that I thought I never could make. "I kept my promise," I heard myself saying. That's right. I promised to come back. And here I was...just like Sora had done.  
  
Kairi smiled, though tears were falling down her cheeks. "I...I thought you might...that you might not-"  
  
"It doesn't matter. I'm back now and that is all that matters," I interrupted, wiping away some of her tears. Then I reached into my pocket, lifting out a star-shaped item. It was her good luck charm, and it showed signs of wear and tear from being a keychain, though it was still intact. I placed it carefully into her hands, and she held it tightly to her chest, cradling the treasured item.  
  
Kairi looked up at me with her ocean blues eyes and there seemed to be several things I could see in them. For one, relief that I had returned, and also happiness. Yet there was something else that I saw that made me jump inside. It was what I had longed for all those years. It was the one thing that she had reserved...it was...love. I saw love in her eyes.  
  
And that love was for me.  
  
"Kairi...I love you." I held my breath for a moment, hoping to hear her response.  
  
She leaned in closer to me, tears no longer falling onto the sand. "I love you too, Riku. More than I have ever even realized."  
  
I leaned forward, and her lips met mine. We stayed in an embrace, the kiss being more than how I imagined it to be. It was passionate, yet gentle. I could swear there were fireworks inside of me, or a roller coaster. I don't think I felt so alive.  
  
When we finally broke away I couldn't help but look in the direction of my old home...Sora's home now. I glanced up at the window, and...sure enough that crazy old spiky haired goof was staring down at us. And he was frowning.  
  
Yes...it was all coming together. Going my way. I had looked up at him for a split second, then turned my attention back to Kairi. I would be able to see soon enough the anguish Sora was feeling. Kairi then sighed.  
  
"I've missed you so much." She told me. I couldn't help but return the phrase.  
  
Kairi grabbed my hand, turning towards my home. "You should get cleaned up. It looks like you've been battling nonstop."  
  
I remembered that my clothes were tattered and ripped, and that I was dirty as well. I guess I had hardly noticed. I was glad however, to say that my clothes were almost identical to what I had worn a few years back. Except that they were larger since I had grown and only a few parts were different. Like, for instance, around my neck was a silver crown necklace, like the one Sora had. I knew I'd need to clean up and change, so I nodded to Kairi, gently squeezing her hand.  
  
"I guess I do need to fresh up in the powder room," I responded. Kairi giggled just like when she was younger. We continued to walk along the sandy beach until I reached my home.  
  
She told me to go to her house when I was done. Then we would go tell Sora the good news. Yeah...good news for me, I thought. But not for him. We kissed again before we parted, then I rushed into my home, taking about one of the quickest showers I think I've ever taken.  
  
It was kind of strange being in Sora's old house, but since I virtually did live there before, I was used to it. It was nice to see that most of my room was just the way my old one had been. Yep, I was always pretty much neat, like Kairi. Unlike Sora who threw his dirty clothes down on the floor then a week later he'd wake up and grab any old unwashed wrinkled shirt on the ground and throw it on.  
  
I had to admit he wasn't too lazy or messy, but he pulled that stunt often enough to just annoy me so much. Especially when his clothes smelled really bad.  
  
I was rushing like crazy, anxious to hurry up with my great luck with this whole 'going into the past' thing. I sat on my bed, pulling a blue unbuttoned shirt over my white cotton shirt. I couldn't help but realize that Sora must have had a lot...and I mean a lot of cuts and bruises on him. Because I sure did.  
  
Sitting there, the sunlight filtering into my room, I started to really think. I was a little confused. Sora and I had ultimately switched places, yet we were still able to keep things from our original selves.  
  
I still had my clothes, and my room status, and my thoughts, yet there were parts of Sora that had been put in...like his necklace, or the stuffed teddy bear that was lying on my bed. It was a little odd, but I decided that they were minor details that didn't matter.  
  
What was bothering me the most was about Ansem. I still hadn't forgotten about him, like he had asked. I wanted to know if he really was living a normal life with no trouble like he had said. But then again, the Heartless were still alive. And somehow I knew that Ansem must still be controlling them, and that he had lied to me. But why? If I was happy here on Destiny Islands with all that I wanted, why would he care to lie to me? I was going to leave him alone anyways....unless of course he attacked Kairi or myself, or this island.  
  
I shook all of these thoughts away, knowing that I should stop thinking about them. Why should I stress out about these little things that weren't making any difference in my life right now anyways? I shrugged everything off, pieces of Kairi taking their place in my mind.  
  
I pulled on my blue and black sneakers, then rushed out of my room, down the stairs, and out of the house. My silver hair was still partially wet, but I didn't mind. The beads of water that still clung on to it made it seem to glisten even more, especially in the sun.  
  
I hurriedly made my way to Kairi's place, clumps of sand flying everywhere as I tried to reach her as fast as I could. I reached her door in what seemed like only a few seconds, knocking steadily.  
  
And she answered the door right away. My angel, my life. Kairi. She had filled that void inside of me that had been empty for so long. And I felt complete...not that broken emotion of longing and wanting but never receiving that I had felt not too long ago. Kairi had saved me.  
  
She smiled, and I beamed right back. "You look really nice," she commented.  
  
"Thanks." I wrapped my arm around her waist, pulling her closer to me. We turned and began to walk as I said, "Let's go tell Sora I'm back."  
  
"I'm sure he'll be pleased."  
  
"Yeah...." I muttered. "Really pleased."


	7. That's How I Felt

**AN:** Sorry for taking a while. I usually type a little bit of the next chapter each day but I've been busy so I had to type it all today and I had to babysit. But at least this chapter is a pretty good length. I'm not exactly sure the length of this story but I know it won't be too long. I have an idea on how many chapters it'll be but I won't say until I get a clearer picture. Anyways, thanks for reviewing. It always makes my day to read nice reviews. Anyways, here's another chapter for Symphony of Death! It isn't one of my faves but I had to do it, so yeah. Read.  
  
**Disclaimer:** I do not own Kingdom Hearts. Don't sue me!  
  
**Chapter Seven: That's How _I_ Felt**  
  
By the time we got to Sora's home the sun was well set and the night had almost fully bloomed. The door was unlocked, just like all the other houses. No one ever had any worries about crime, because that never happened. The most valuable thing on the islands that anyone owned would be friendship. Not counting the Heartless, danger had never really stepped foot on our small home.  
  
I pushed open the door, Kairi walking inside close behind me. I didn't know what to expect when I would see Sora. I wasn't that sure if he would react the same way I did.  
  
Scratch that. He wouldn't act the way I did. Even if we did switch places, Sora was never one to hold a grudge and take it out on people. At least that was what I hoped. My mind cringed with the thought that Sora would turn dark like I did and attack me.  
  
So as I walked up the stairs and neared Sora's room, I had no clue what was going to happen. Kairi held me back a bit, then opened the door.  
  
"Hey, Sora! Guess what?!"  
  
Hmmm....he was still in the room at least. Not like I had done, climbing on the roof and all.  
  
"What?" Sora asked, his voice tinged with an I-already-know-what-it-is-but- I'll-just-pretend-I-don't-know- kind of sound to it, though Kairi didn't seem to notice. She really was a little clueless about some things.  
  
She never truly took any of our hints when we were younger. Maybe she did, but she never showed it very much. A little flirt here and there, but nothing big. I guess it took both Sora and I risking our lives for her to realize that.  
  
"Well, it's what we've been waiting for. Riku's back! He came back!" Then she pulled me into the doorway. My first glimpse of Sora made me almost jump.  
  
Did _I_ look like that when we had our conversation? I know I looked frazzled and sad, but Sora had something different about him. I mean, he looked like he had just lost everything he had. Well, maybe in a way he did.  
  
I smiled. It felt good to see him this way though. His hair was more unruly than usual, and he looked pale, despite his tan. He looked up at me, trying really hard to be happy but I could tell inside that he was crushed.  
  
"Riku, glad to have you back." His tone did not match his words. He stood up, not even looking at Kairi, and pushed past us. "I gotta go," he mumbled, rushing down the hall and into the bathroom, locking himself inside.  
  
I gave Kairi a 'what's wrong with him' look and she sighed, frowning. "He's um....he's upset I guess that...."  
  
"You don't have to explain. I know." I told her quietly. I didn't want to make it hard for her. She made the right decision by picking me and I didn't want her feeling sorry for rejecting Sora. I put my hand on her shoulder. "I'll talk to him."  
  
Kairi nodded, then slowly began to walk away. "I'll see you tomorrow morning, then. We can have a little party for you."  
  
"That would be great," I responded. I waved goodbye, then turned my attention to the bathroom door and the miserable boy behind it.  
  
"Sora? What's up?" I asked.  
  
No response. I was a little surprised by how Sora was acting. I hadn't suspected that he'd be acting this obvious in his discouragement that I was back. But I guess he needed time alone, like I did.  
  
"Are you okay?" I decided to try to get some words out of his mouth.  
  
"Yeah, I'm perfectly fine. Everything's perfect. I hope it stays like this forever." He said sarcastically.  
  
I smiled. "Kairi's giving _me _a party tomorrow. I hope to see you there. Well, bye!" I decided to leave it at that, giving him nothing to look forward to. I wouldn't be surprised if he didn't show up.  
  
As I left his home, I chuckled a bit. "See, Sora? That's how _I _felt..."  
  
The next morning, I couldn't wait to see Kairi again...Sora too, if I could. I was looking forward to all the attention I'd be getting from Wakka and the gang at the celebration as well.  
  
The air was cool, and the sun was peeking in and out of the clouds. I could see a few tables and chairs set up on the beach, but that was it. I caught a glimpse of my redhead setting a few small boxes on the table. I called out her name and ran over to her.  
  
"Riku!" she said happily as she saw me near. "Glad you're here. I have to show you something before the party starts."  
  
At first I didn't know what she was talking about, but then I realized. The secret place. I totally forgot about the cave, and the drawing, and....and the paopu fruit.  
  
"Alright, show me."  
  
Kairi grabbed my hand and we quickly went over to the cave. It was a tight fit, like it had been before, but we managed to squeeze through. The drawing was in the same spot, except my face replaced Sora's.  
  
Kairi slowly neared the drawing, talking quietly but loud enough so that I could still hear her. "I...I wasn't sure if you'd come back. But I came here every day. And I always hoped that this sketch would come true. That I would see you again and share the paopu with you."  
  
"Well, here I am." I grinned.  
  
Kairi pulled out the yellow star-shaped fruit. "They say that once two people share one, their destinies become intertwined. We'll remain a part of each other's lives, no matter what."  
  
"And I believe that it's true," I responded. "Even if it isn't, we'll still be together forever. I know we will. We have to."  
  
Kairi neared me, holding up the paopu. I edged closer to her and also took hold of the fruit. Then we both bit into it at the same time. I don't know about Kairi, but it sure felt like our destinies were becoming one. There was just something inside of me that made my eyes turn brighter, if that was even possible.  
  
We finished the fruit, and I tossed the leaves onto the ground. One of them fell onto the ground in the light that filtered in through the hole in the cave's ceiling. I only hoped that Sora would find them. If not, I knew I'd be sure to brag to him about it when I got the chance.  
  
I wrapped my arms around Kairi. "Everything's perfect."  
  
"I know."  
  
"I'm never going to leave you again. Ever. No matter _what_."  
  
Kairi sighed. "Good. Because even if you did have to go, I'd still go with you...no matter what." Then she giggled. "Well, we better hurry. Many of the islanders will be anxious to see you back."  
  
"Alright."  
  
It had only taken a short amount of time for Kairi and I to set everything up. I didn't mind fixing my own decorations and such. It was fun just doing it with her. And soon, the beach was filled with people. There were even some welcome home gifts too that I could open later.  
  
"Hey, man! How've ya been? Nice to see ya again, bro!" the cheery Wakka called out to me, slapping me on the back. "Ain't it nice to relax after all those years of work?"  
  
"Yeah. It sure is. Glad to see you too."  
  
Tidus came up to me, giving me a hug. "Hmph. You can still kick my butt that's for sure! You'll still be that tall strong kid I always knew. Except now you aren't a kid!"  
  
I laughed. "Oh, I'm sure now you'll be a worthy opponent. We'll fight sometime soon, huh?"  
  
"Sure!" Tidus smiled, then went off to get some tropical drinks from a table.  
  
He returned with Selphie by his side. She took a few sips from her drink. "I just can't believe it's been two years!" she said, amazed. "Oh, you and Kairi are the cutest couple!!!! Well, except Tidus and me!" She giggled.  
  
I laughed. It was weird seeing how much everyone had changed, yet how little they really had. I never really noticed it before. "Have any of you guys seen Sora?" I asked, remembering that I still needed to make him more miserable.  
  
"Ya know, I haven't seen him all day!" Wakka said in his accent. "Maybe he overslept or something."  
  
"No, Sora never oversleeps," Kairi said. "He's just kind of depressed lately because of something."  
  
Wakka and Tidus nodded. "Oh, yeah, we get it."  
  
Selphie looked around. "What? What do you two get? What about it?"  
  
Kairi laughed. "Come on, Selph, you're the most "romantic" person here. You always know what's going on with stuff on the island."  
  
"No, seriously. I don't know what you guys are talking about!"  
  
Wakka laughed. "Man, you really are kinda ditzy sometimes, aren't ya?"  
  
"Hey!" Selphie cried out.  
  
"Hey!" Tidus also called out.  
  
I started laughing hard, and Kairi did too. It was funny. But what was even funnier was that I got Kairi and Sora didn't. I was enjoying this moment so much, hoping that Sora was staring down from his window. I'd pay a visit to his house after the party. I couldn't wait to see his pale, sad face again.  
  
I wanted him to be at the end of his rope so much. Yet there was a strange feeling inside of me that I didn't recognize. It was something that I couldn't quite put my finger on. Little did I know that that feeling would grow and it would affect a huge decision that I would have to make in the future...


	8. An Unexpected Turn

**AN:** Alright! I'm so glad I was able to get a chapter in before I leave. I have so much stuff to do over the next few days.( I'll be gone for 10 days, meaning I'll be coming back the 25th. But don't worry. I'll try to write out the next chapter or two by hand and when I get back I'll type it and put it up as soon as I can. This chapter talks about Riku approaching Sora again. I hope you guys like it. I'll miss you all!  
  
By the way, did you guys read the review I got by Shadow of Sora?. It made me feel kinda down but I know it isn't true. (they did apologize though so that's good) But please, leave me nice reviews and make me happy!!!! Oh, and Lyphe- how can I do multiple reviews? Tell me your secret!  
  
Also, I just wanted to let you guys know that there will probably be only two or three chapters after this one. Just giving you a heads up!  
  
**Disclaimer:** I'm getting tired with writing this all the time. I don't own Kingdom Hearts. I do own several other things of lesser value, though. Like my hunk of junk old computer!  
  
**Chapter Eight: An Unexpected Turn  
**  
The party had been over for a while, and everyone returned to their homes after helping to clean up a bit. I had told Kairi that I would talk with Sora, and she agreed it would be best if she didn't come. She said that Sora might be able to open up to me better if she wasn't there.  
  
Well, I wasn't sure if he'd open up to me at all. As I walked up to his house, I expected the door to be locked. But it wasn't. So I opened it and walked inside, only to be greeted by a rush of hot air. Was Sora aware that it was hotter in here than it was outside? He must have forgotten to turn on the air conditioner or something. By the time I made it up to his room I was sweating a great deal. I thought I'd find a melted puddle of Sora when I went into his room.  
  
But his door was open a crack and I gently pushed it open. "Sora?"  
  
He was sitting on his bed, and he actually looked half melted. His hair was lopsided and hanging down from lack of gel. It didn't look like he had gotten much sleep, because he had bags under his eyes. His face was still pale and he was sweating a great deal much more than I was. His clothes were even the same from yesterday.  
  
It looked like once Kairi and I left yesterday he had gone out of the bathroom, sat on his bed, and hadn't moved at all. When I called his name he didn't even look up. Was he even alive?  
  
"Uh, Sora?" I said once again. "Are you aware that this house is like a fire pit? Don't you want to turn on the air conditioning?" I didn't really care about him that much, but for the most part I was saying that for my sake. I wiped a few beads of sweat that were trickling down the side of my face, waiting for an answer.  
  
Sora shrugged, his eyes still fixed on the floor. I walked a few steps and sat down next to him on the bed. "Uh, whatever." I decided to change the subject. "Anyways, you missed my 'welcome back' party. Everyone was there. Kairi and I shared a paopu fruit, too." Sora shrugged again, though I think he stiffened a bit when I mentioned the paopu.  
  
"Listen. Why don't you come with Kairi and me and we can race again, just like old times, huh? How about it?"  
  
Sora scoffed. "You'll just beat me like you always do," he mumbled.  
  
What? I still won the races? That made me glad. I guess even though Sora and I switched places I was still stronger than him and kept my own attributes. I smiled inwardly.  
  
"Do you want to talk to Kairi instead?" I asked. She'd make him feel worse. Kairi would probably tell him all the reasons she likes him but then say she likes me better and it has to be that way. Well, it was true.  
  
"No. I don't want to talk to anyone." Sora sighed. "No one will understand. Not even you."  
  
I smiled. "Oh, but I do. I know exactly how you are feeling. Or, at least I _did _know how you felt."  
  
"Huh?" Sora looked up at me for the first time.  
  
Oops. Can't let anything spill. They couldn't know about me going to the past and all to change everything. Though I bet if I told them they wouldn't believe me. But still... "Never mind. What I'm trying to say is..." Then I stopped. What _was_ I trying to say? Sure, I knew I had come here to make Sora miserable, but how else could I do that?  
  
Then I thought up a plan. I'd make Sora suffer for a few days more, then once he gets over it I guess we could still be friends. Just like what I had said before. Sora was still my friend, in a way, but I guess friends do turn against each other. I knew that now Sora resented me and I resented him. But it wouldn't be fun for him to stay like that forever. I mean, I'd still have Kairi and all the while he could still hang around with us a bit.  
  
Yet now it looked to me that he was getting really depressed. I had been truly devastated that Kairi had chosen Sora over me before all of this, and my outward anger, jealousy and sadness were destroying me. But Sora did things differently. He kept it all on the inside, until one day it would finally grow so large that he'd explode.  
  
I sighed. "Well, Sora. There's nothing else none of us can do but wait until things wear down. Then it'll be back to normal."  
  
Sora glared at me. "Yeah, normal as in you get Kairi and I'm stuck here with nothing. Do you even know what she meant to me?"  
  
I was a little taken aback. "Yes," I said, in an equally annoyed tone. "But she means more to me. You don't know what I was willing to do to make her mine."  
  
Sora stood up, walking to his window, staring outside. "Yes I do. You were willing to become the Keyblade Master and save everyone and sacrifice yourself for her. But I risked my life so that she could live." He turned to face me, looking almost like a ghost. "Sure, I was on the wrong side. But how was I to know that? I was given fake promises, and I ultimately plunged deeper and deeper into the darkness without realizing it. But don't you see? We both did what we had to do to save Kairi. And I feel like she hasn't even thanked me a bit!" Sora was breathing heavily, his voice slowly rising.  
  
"And she doesn't seem to recognize all that I did for her! I spent two years with her alone. And you know what? She would always be talking about you. 'I wonder where Riku is. I hope he comes home soon.' It was like she was in a trance. She practically ignored all of us on the island, but me the most." His fists clenched, then he loosened them and let them hang loosely by his side. His burning blue eyes were all that seemed to have life, and they penetrated me deep.  
  
"But....but I think I know why she kept her distance from me. She was afraid she might start forgetting about you and start falling for me. Maybe she thought that you might come back any day and she would've betrayed you. Well you know what?! She betrayed me! We were supposed to be friends, and I would've kept it that way if I knew this stupid thing would tear us apart!"  
  
He finally stopped, all of his words suddenly losing their energy. My eyes widened a little too. Did I hear him correctly? He would've been happy just with us being _friends_? I stood up.  
  
"Sora, I love Kairi too much to only be friends. Sure, it wouldn't be as bad if she wasn't going out with either of us. But to me it would be impossible. I wouldn't be able to keep it in. It would just be too hard to transform my love for Kairi into friendship only," I spoke.  
  
Sora turned around again, his hands gripping the sides of his window. "Well, to tell you the truth, I kind of feel the same way. It's too hard to see you two together. I mean, just look at me. I've fallen apart and it hasn't even been two days. I just...I just wish things were different..." His tone wasn't harsh anymore.  
  
That was too true to what I had been feeling. Those were my thoughts not too long ago. But I hoped that Sora wouldn't get the same chance I did to turn everything around. I began walking towards the door. "Sometimes wishes don't come true. I don't know everything, but something tells me that things aren't going to change around here. So you're just going to have to live with it all. I...I guess I'll see you later."  
  
I left the room, but only pretended to walk away. I still stood against his wall, within hearing range. There was something about the way Sora was acting that was explainable, yet I felt like he had more to say, though he didn't get those words out to me.  
  
There was only silence for a few minutes, then I heard the floorboards creak as Sora took a few steps around. He opened a few drawers, fumbling with some items, then I think he sat down on the bed. Everything was quiet again for a little while until Sora spoke up again, talking to himself.  
  
"So...I'm going to have to live with it all? Well, I...I just can't. I can't live with Kairi not being mine. I guess it's impossible to do so." He sighed. "So I guess there's only one other option I have..." I heard a few faint noises, small little clicks. Then I realized...  
  
"Sora, no!" I jumped into his room. I was right. Sora...he had a gun in his hand. This was totally unexpected. He was going to kill himself?  
  
Sora jumped, and looked like he was about to faint. The gun slid from his hands and clanked onto the floor. "R-Riku!"  
  
Before he could do anything I grabbed the gun, careful to point it downwards. Sora got over his shock and glared at me. "Hey, what do you think you're doing?!"  
  
"I'm not going to let you kill yourself Sora." For some reason I didn't want him to kill himself. Sure, I had wanted him hurt and depressed, but I still had Kairi so I didn't want this to happen. "Come on, Sora. Don't do this."  
  
Sora was still looking at me strangely. "You were spying on me?!"  
  
I sighed. "I just wanted to know what was up with you. I mean, I know why you're angry but still..."  
  
"Please Riku. I have nothing to live for. I just want to kill myself and end it all. What good will happen to me while I'm here. Nothing good has ever happened to me."  
  
My fingers rolled over the sleek metal of the gun, my hands still extremely sweaty from the heat. "Not like this, Sora. Kairi and I are your friends and we need you too. You can't just leave us."  
  
"Yes I can!" Sora yelled and lunged at the weapon. I easily kept it away from him. I pushed Sora back onto the bed.  
  
"You know what? I'm going to get Kairi," I said. "And she'll tell you how much she still cares about you. Granted, you're only her friend. But on the plus side, you're her friend. Just listen to what she and I will say to you. Then you can decide."  
  
Sora pouted for a moment, then slowly nodded. "Fine. But...but I really don't see the point. You two are obviously together happily, so why should I get in the way. I never really mattered anyways."  
  
I sighed. "I'll get her and come back in a few minutes. Just promise me you won't move until then."  
  
"I promise." His deep blue eyes bit into my skin but they told me his words were sincere.  
  
I nodded, then turned, still wondering myself why I was so concerned with saving Sora's life. I mean, yeah, I knew that he was my friend and I still had plenty of good times with him, but half of me wanted him gone. It was true he could still get in the way of Kairi and I, but I knew that Kairi would still be devastated if he committed suicide. And I certainly didn't want Kairi to be hurt.  
  
The strange feeling inside of my continued to grow, and for a moment, I had almost forgotten that it was there. But this incident was causing me to question some of my thoughts. I shook them off for now, concentrating on reaching Kairi as quickly as I could. She would be able to help mediate between Sora's decision of life...or death...


	9. With or Without You

**AN:** Hey everyone! I'm back! I had so much fun! Wee...and I got a pretty decent amount of writing done as well. Um, it's late but I'm still typing this up anyways. I'm really happy though. All of your reviews are so uplifting and make me feel really warm inside! :) I hope you enjoy this chapter. The next one will be the last! :(  
  
**Disclaimer:** Me no own Kingdom Hearts. Me like Kingdom Hearts. Me type chappie now.  
  
**Chapter Nine: With or Without You**  
  
_Pound...pound...pound...  
_  
Why would Kairi choose to lock her door at a time like this? Why? I shifted from side to side anxiously.  
  
_Pound..._  
  
The door swung open as I knocked again, causing me to stumble forward. Kairi's face appeared, looking surprised. "Riku! What's the matter? Why were you pounding like that?"  
  
I grabbed her wrist, pulling her out of the doorway. "There's no time for much standing around talking, Kairi," I said, all the while pulling her across the sand. "But it's important. Sora...we talked...but, but he was going to commit suicide."  
  
"What?!" Kairi breathed heavily as we ran even faster.  
  
"Yes. And if you, or I, or both of us don't somehow change his mind about it, then-"  
  
"But what if he's doing it right now?" Kairi interrupted. Her voice was full of worry. "I can't believe he'd even _think_ about something like that! I mean, I know he was upset a little, but...but I didn't think he'd act that way!"  
  
I nodded. "He promised me he'd wait to hear us out before anything. But we need to get there a.s.a.p."  
  
Soon, Kairi and I made it to Sora's house. We flung open the door and rushed up the steps. Kairi made a quick comment on the intense heat in the house before she opened Sora's door and we went inside. The only problem was that Sora wasn't there! Kairi and I briefly searched the room, but we couldn't find him.  
  
"Sora?" I called out nervously. I went back into the hall and checked the other rooms. They were all empty.  
  
Kairi went up to me. "Do you think he-"  
  
"No." I said simply. "He promised he'd stay here. I could tell he meant it too." I bit my lip. "Maybe he's downstairs..."  
  
After a fairly thorough search of the house, Sora was nowhere to be seen. I figured he probably was still alive.  
  
"Maybe he _did_ leave," I said. "He must have had some reason for it though. But where would he have gone?" Part of me didn't care, but the other part did. "He couldn't have gone far. I was gone for only a little bit."  
  
"Do you think...maybe he went to the secret place?" Kairi suggested.  
  
I nodded, my heart pounding louder than I had knocked on the door. What if Sora opened that door to the darkness? I thought hard. I hoped that it wasn't true.  
  
"Then let's go." Kairi said, moving past me. I followed her, and we moved as quickly as we could to the cave.  
  
But when we got there, we still had no answers. The door was closed, Sora wasn't there, and neither was any sign that he had been. I sighed. The island wasn't very large. If he didn't leave the island, Sora had to be _somewhere_ nearby.  
  
Kairi showed her uneasiness clear on her face. I put my arm around her and we walked towards the cave exit. "It's okay, Kai. Let's check the rest of the island." We ducked down and slowly made our way outside.  
  
Then Kairi and I froze. Right in front of us was a sight that I never expected to see. It was...Ansem. He was somehow levitating in the air, and in one hand he held Sora, who was unconscious. I drew my breath as Ansem smiled evilly.  
  
"Hello, Riku. Nice to see you've forgotten about me for a bit. Thanks so much for leaving Sora all alone for me. My plan will soon slowly reveal itself."  
  
I grinded my teeth together. "I knew you might try something. Whatever it is, you won't get away with it."  
  
"Oh, but I will." He laughed.  
  
Kairi shuddered and clung close to me, speechless.  
  
"You thought you could just have everything be fine and I'd stay out of your life? What a fool." Ansem laughed again, still hovering high above the sand. "You're so easy to manipulate. Always thinking things are going perfectly your way until my underlying plan is revealed."  
  
"Riku, what is he talking about?" Kairi questioned. "Sora was the one who went over to the darkness and gave in to Ansem."  
  
"Uh..." I couldn't get many words out. I wasn't sure if I wanted to tell Kairi.  
  
Ansem's voice broke the silence. "You'll find that out soon enough. For now, I have something to say to Riku."  
  
I balled my fists and glared at Ansem as he continued. "Riku, in my hands is the same boy who took away all that was supposed to be yours. But now that you have what you want, it may soon all be snatched away again."  
  
"What do you mean?" I asked. I was really starting to sweat, and it wasn't just from the heat.  
  
Ansem's fiery eyes stared straight at me. "You can't have everything. That's why I'm making you choose. You must pick between Sora's life or Kairi's love and affection."  
  
"What?!" I exclaimed.  
  
"You heard me right, boy. If you choose to keep Kairi, Sora will die. And if you choose for Sora to live, you'll lose Kairi's love, and everything will go back to the way things were, with you being miserable," Ansem explained.  
  
Kairi took a step back. "Riku, what is going on? What does he mean?"  
  
I shook my head. "Kairi...I..."  
  
"Tell me," she pleaded. I knew she was having trouble understanding all of this. So I had no choice but to explain everything to her.  
  
"Alright," I sighed. "This...all of this...it's real...but it really isn't. I went back into the past and switched places with Sora because I was jealous that he got you and I didn't. I'm not sure exactly why, but I followed Ansem, hoping to get my revenge somehow and I decided that as long as you loved me I wouldn't care, so I agreed to change the past. I was slowly becoming consumed by the darkness again and tried to hurt Sora...but then I decided that I could hurt him worse emotionally, rather than physically."  
  
Kairi seemed a little confused. "So...so _Sora_ is really supposed to be the Keyblade Master? And...and I love_ him_ instead?"  
  
"Yeah, it's true." I closed my eyes. "I'm sorry. And now all of this is causing more trouble than I thought it would be..."  
  
And then I felt it. A stinging slap across my face. "How could you?!" Kairi cried out. She looked down on the ground, not even able to look me in the eyes. "You did all of that because you didn't get what you wanted? And you're risking Sora's life to get it? I can't believe you'd be so...so selfish."  
  
I hadn't expected her to act that way. Sure, I knew she'd be upset. But she believed every word I said and she took it to heart. She was right, though. Sora's way of dealing with it all was ending his life. But my way was worse. I was risking other's lives and so much more to get what I wanted, doing whatever it took to get there. "I know, Kairi. I know. But...but you have to understand that I did all of that because I loved you too much to let you be with someone else."  
  
Kairi shook her head, which still hung down low. "It doesn't matter. You broke the love between the two people who had a stronger bond. And...and there's no excuse for doing that."  
  
Ansem spoke again, momentarily forgotten in the conversation. "Hmph. Seems like you've put yourself in a pickle, Riku. Stuck between love or heartbreak...life or death." Ansem drifted slowly until he sat upon the top of one of the palm trees, Sora still in his arms. "But you must choose, Riku. Think about all you've done to get here. And think about the pain Sora put you through. There really isn't anything to think about. It's easy to just end Sora's life. Then he won't be in your way ever again."  
  
I glanced back at Kairi, who seemed to be deeply counting every grain of sand near her feet. I looked back at Ansem. This was hard. I didn't want Sora to die just a little while ago, but that was when I would still have Kairi. And now, I had to choose between the two. Kairi probably wouldn't forgive me if I let Sora die, and she might even refuse to be with me, so then I'd be left with nothing. But then if I let Sora live, then he would get Kairi, and things would be like they were before. To some people, it might not be such a tough decision. But for me, it was hard. Ansem's words sunk into me, and I knew that I loved Kairi more than anything. What was I to do? And why did any of this matter to Ansem? I still didn't know what he would be getting out of any of this, but I knew that it had to be revealed sometime. My mouth was dry, and I desperately needed something to quench my thirst. But I knew that first I would have to make the biggest decision of my life. I faced Kairi again.  
  
"Kairi?" She didn't look up. "This is a hard choice. I don't know what to do. It's easy to pick between being with or without you. But when you throw Sora's life in there it compicates things."  
  
"I bet it does," Kairi muttered. "I...I thought I loved you...but really I was loving someone else. This isn't who you are. You're fake to me now. And I'm not sorry that things aren't going as you've planned. I hope you can make the right decision." Then her eyes finally met mine. "I'm trying to take all of this in right now. I just want you to think about all you'll be losing if you let Sora die. Obviously you care about him somewhat, because you didn't want him to commit suicide. I think that if you look deep inside, you'll find the answer you're looking for."  
  
I nodded slowly. I would have to look inside of myself for the answer. I would be sure to find it there, somewhere. It's funny how quickly things turn around, how fast feelings can change and thoughts can arise. But now was the time to decide. I closed my eyes, reaching within my inner being, my choice slowly becoming clearer as my heart and soul told me what to do. I opened my eyes, looking up to Ansem's cruel grin.  
  
"I choose..."


	10. More Things That Change

**AN:** Ugh! I had written a lot of this chapter on my trip, and now I can't find the papers! I thought they were in my binder but they weren't. So now I have to type this up as best I can trying to remember what I wrote. Sigh. So bear with me if this is kinda messed up and short. Well, at least I've finally finished this fic! It's a big accomplishment for me (which it isn't even much!) I'm really glad that all of you have enjoyed this story as much as I have. I want to take some time to thank all of my reviewers:  
  
**Lvkishugs** (thanks for the idea!!!)  
  
**Zanisha  
**  
**Tako Hana**  
  
**Lyphe** (I still like this name!)  
  
**Doomboy2000  
**  
**Astaldotholwen  
**  
**ally**  
  
**The Shadow of Sora  
**  
**aliasfan** :)  
  
**Disclaimer:** I do not own the characters of Sora, Riku, or Kairi. Neither do I own Kingdom Hearts.  
  
**Chapter Ten: More Things That Change  
**  
I took a deep breath. "I choose...to save the life of my friend, Sora."  
  
Kairi was staring intently at me now, her expression clearly telling me that I did the right thing. I looked to see Ansem's reaction. He seemed a little shocked. Well, I actually was too. I finally realized that the thing that was inside of me was guilt. That little feeling of regret for what I had done grew until I understood that what I did was flat out wrong.  
  
"You..you mean you'll give up Kairi's love for...for _this_?" Ansem sputtered out. I think he really believed I would let Sora die. But now a huge weight had been lifted off of my chest. If I said it, I must have really felt it.  
  
"Yeah, for_ that_. My best friend."  
  
Ansem swallowed hard. "He was never your friend. I guess you still haven't figured that out."  
  
I shook my head. "No." My eyes stared at Sora's limp form. I remembered everything from the past. "_He_ was the true friend," I told Ansem. And in a way I was also telling myself. "I may have realized what a great friend he was to me if I had actually been a great friend to him. But I gave him the cold shoulder, and believed what I wanted to believe. But now that's changed. Sora really is better than me. I don't think I could be as nice as he is. And for that I know he deserves to be the Keyblade Master. He deserves Kairi. And I deserve to be both of their friends."  
  
I felt something on my shoulder. It was Kairi's hand. "Riku, thanks."  
  
I smiled, then remembered Ansem still had Sora. "Okay, now let Sora go. Things will go back the way they were before. I'm ready for that."  
  
Ansem hesitated, then floated down to the ground, still a fair distance away from us. His eyes seemed to be flickering, and I was wondering if he would be true to his word. I mean, Ansem was never the guy to trust. He pulled something out of his cloak, holding it with one hand.  
  
"The time sphere..." I said slowly.  
  
He brought it forward, then suddenly dropped it in the sand.I took a step forward as Ansem let loose his grasp on Sora and let him fall on the ground. Ansem then doubled over, seemingly in pain. "W-what's going on?" I asked.  
  
Slowly, Ansem was fading...disappearing. He looked up at me, the fire still in his eyes. "You...you won..." He gasped. I didn't understand. By now, Ansem's feet were completely gone. "I...I thought you had so much hatred...so much darkness in you...that...that you would let Sora die. But...but you didn't. If you had, I would be alive and well. But...but now, since you have chosen to go back to the way things used to be, I cannot be the way I am. You won...I put all my strength into going into the past...and now...now I cannot reside here, or anywhere." His legs had vanished.  
  
It was all making sense now. Ansem was sure that I would allow the death of Sora. I might have wanted to hurt him in the past, but now I wanted anything but that. I felt like I had broken through my own form of darkness. And that light was too much for Ansem to handle. "Can you hear it?" he spoke. "That sound...I thought it would be for Sora...it's a symphony of death. But the music is playing for me, instead."  
  
By this time the only thing left was his head. I didn't hear anything, but I agreed with Ansem. He was dying. But in a way I had died, and now I was alive, becoming a whole new person. I was glad that I would never have to see him again. Ansem bet his money on the wrong horse, and now he was paying for it. Big time. And then, before he could say anything else, he was gone. I hoped it was forever. I found myself running along with Kairi towards Sora.  
  
I waved my hands through the air where Ansem had been, just to make sure. Then I bent down and lifted Sora up slightly off the ground. "Sora? Can you hear me? It's over. I'm sorry. I truly am sorry..."  
  
Kairi still had tears in her eyes, but they didn't fall. "Riku, I don't think he's going to wake up now, or even anytime soon."  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
Kairi pointed next to me. It was the transparent sphere, which was now glowing. "I think you need to go back into the future...or in your case, the present."  
  
"You may be right." I grabbed the ball, shifting it in my hands. "Kairi," I said, standing up. "I don't think you'll remember any of this, but I promise to make sure that nothing like this will happen again."  
  
Kairi smiled. I prepared to leave. I was about to close my eyes, but before I could even think about the time I wanted to go to, a bright white light flashed, and it seemed like a million cameras all flashing at the exact same time. I thought about shielding my eyes from the intense light, but for some reason the light didn't bother me. The white faded and I looked around at my surroundings.  
  
The sphere was no longer in my hands. What time frame had it taken me to? I was thinking about going to about the time right when Sora returned, but I had been in my room. Right now I was standing on the beach of Destiny Islands as a cool wind stirred awake.  
  
My eyes scanned the island, until I spotted something that gave me my answer. It was Kairi, and she was leaning against a tree. Now I knew. I was at the time right before I told Kairi that I had loved her. I realized that it made sense to come at this time. I had to reassure Kairi that Sora was going to come back. And I had to let her know that it was okay for her to be with Sora.  
  
I quickly went over to her. I was actually happy to be able to change things. "Kai?"  
  
"Hm?" Kairi looked up at me.  
  
"I know what you've been thinking about lately. And I have something to say. It's about Sora."  
  
Kairi's eyes widened a bit when I mentioned his name, but she remained silent. "He's going to come back, you know," I continued.  
  
Kairi looked at her feet. "I...I really really want him to come back. And half of me believes he will. But the other half doesn't. It's been two years that I've been waiting..."  
  
"And that's the same two years he's been waiting to be with you, too." I braced myself for my next words. "Kairi, Sora loves you. And you love him. That's enough to bring him back." Surprisingly, what I said didn't bother me. I knew that this was what Kairi wanted, and I shouldn't interfere. I only wanted to make sure that things would go the way they were intended to go. I knew in my heart that Kairi and Sora were destined to be together. And that didn't mean that I'd be pushed out of the picture. I'd still be there with them.  
  
Kairi seemed a little startled by my words. She hadn't expected me to act that way. She knew that I had feelings for her. And Kairi knew that she'd have to choose between me or Sora. I knew she was going to choose Sora. "But...but what about you?"  
  
I shrugged. I had to make sure Kairi knew that I was fine with her picking Sora. I didn't want her to have any doubts in her mind about doing that. "I'm happy just to be your friend," I responded. Then my tone became a little more serious. "Listen Kairi, I've been through a lot and I've learned that some things are more important than others. I've found out that no one should interfere with destiny. I know that you and Sora are meant to be together. And that's fine by me."  
  
Kairi seemed to be taking all of this in. I wasn't sure if she was going to say anything soon. So I decided to speak up one last time. "I could never be the kind of person that Sora is. He's a great guy, and I have no doubt in my mind he'll come back. And it'll be soon. So you don't have to worry."  
  
Kairi's watery eyes met mine. "Riku...thanks." She threw herself at me in a big hug. That word was enough for me. I knew she had more to say but that pretty much summed it up. I had given her hope and reassurance. And deep down she knew that Sora was truly the one for her.  
  
Kairi pulled away from the hug. "I believe everything you just said." She turned, walking away. But then she looked back. "Oh, and Riku? You're the best friend anyone could ever have." And with that she left, leaving me there, shaded by the huge palm leaves. I swelled with pride. Now we had a stronger bond more than ever. I guess that was enough. I thought I couldn't live without Kairi's love. But now I knew that I did have her love, the kind of love that was in friendship.  
  
Those few days passed slowly, stretching out Sora's return. Instead of Kairi huddling away in the secret cave, she spent more time outside and with her friends, including me. Neither of us were hopeless hermits, but we had connected on a different level. Kairi seemed to open up more and our friendship was the best on the island. The day that Sora would arrive finally came. I felt like I shouldn't be there right away when he would come. That was his and Kairi's special reunion moment, and I didn't want to spoil it by standing there. So I clambered up to my room, staring out the window.  
  
The sunset was out again, and I was reminded again of Kairi. But this time I had a new theory connected with it. The ocean water reflected the sunset off of it's surface. Sora's deep blue eyes reminded me of the ocean, and I could always tell that when I looked in them I saw Kairi. She had always been reflected in his eyes, being his only thoughts.  
  
I stared out of my window, waiting. And then, it happened. Sora appeared on the beach, looking ragged like before. Everything went the way it was planned. I told Kairi to wait on the beach, and she was there. The same events unfolded, Kairi and Sora meeting and talking. And they also kissed. I smiled, this time really meaning it. They were supposed to be together, and I was supposed to be their friend. I was happy for them, and for myself.  
  
The light was stronger in me more than ever. I wouldn't have to worry about anything coming between Kairi, Sora, and me again. And Ansem wouldn't stir up any trouble. Even though his death happened in the supposed past, in my heart and mind I knew that he would never return. Many things had changed, and I was glad they did. I saw Kairi and Sora start to talk again, then they started to walk towards my house. My grin widened, and I ran out of my room and down the stairs to greet my best friends.  
  
As I opened the door, I smiled, knowing that to them my door would always be open, and so would my heart.


End file.
